It was the last of my one on one training sessions with Dean. Outside of the usual WODs I have been working with him to simply get stronger. Strong enough to compete. I have a long way to go but Dean taught me much; resistance training with chains and bands, corrected my deadlift form to where I PR’d twice in the following two weeks.
I’m pretty tall. Especially tall for a girl. Some say they really like a tall woman but the better part of my formative and college years might tell a different story. When in public people usually comment or ask questions about my height. You wouldn’t believe some of things people say. To some; tall equals big equals strong equals not very feminine.
It’s been over a year since starting Crossfit and this much I’ve learned: It all comes down to you. Crossfit is a stripping away of bullshit. Where all that’s left is you competing against yourself. The steel and bumpers and burpees a level playing field. Crossfit forces you to face what’s inside of you.
The process can be nerve wracking and downright scary. There have been moments where I’ve thought about quitting even before the WOD begins. But the clock starts and you start to move and somehow you just keep going. And in that process of going, of pushing through what was thought impossible, you learn about yourself and what you’re truly capable of. It doesn’t always feel good but it is always worth it. And sometimes you gain a piece of yourself that you never even knew existed.
At the end of our last class together I asked Dean for a hug. A big hug. It was a lot to ask. I was sweaty.
He stood on the giant Strongman tire and reached down and hugged me tight. ‘Be confident in your strength,’ he said.
‘Ok.’ I said.
‘Mary,’ he continued, ‘be confident in who you are.’
It’s okay to be strong. It’s okay to be who you are. Crossfit gets you comfortable with being uncomfortable. Crossfit is a training ground for life.