do it.

“Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!” ― Dr. Seuss

Part I. Barbell Gymnastics:

Clean and Jerk: 5 x 2 – rest 30-60 seconds.

Completed: at 65lbs., 75lbs., 85lbs., 90lbs., 95lbs.

Part II of this WOD looked really difficult and I was scared going in.

Part II. Conditioning:

3 rounds for time of:

50′ Burpee Broad Jump
20 KBS 32/24kg
15 C2B Pullups
10 Thrusters 135/95#

(17 minute time limit)

Completed: in 13:47. Scaled to Kettlebells at 45lbs., Thrusters at 65lbs.

Strength in who you are.

I’ve been out of commission since Friday. Nothing tragic. Just a minor setback. The Dr. suggested keeping clear of the squat until Thursday. Okay. Okay. I said.

Fine.

The forced semi-retirement has been good. You know you’ve heard the term, overtraining, and you think, that’s impossible. Overtraining takes a lot of motivation. But, I was pushing so hard with the overhead stuff, wanting it so badly, getting frustrated by the relentless plateau, that this respite might be well timed. Perhaps I was over-obsessing. Is that even possible? Seems accurate enough. Either way, I’m welcoming the break.

I did get in to train with Dean on Monday. Upper body only. ($%#!*#%!@)

It was a great session, and sadly my last with him. Even so he continued to teach. Revelations like how I am not that far from an actual pull-up. That I can go deeper and closer to parallel on the ring push up. He even pushed me to the heaviest kettle bell yet, 88 lbs. Was I just talking about a plateau? Yes, in the overhead. That’s right. We’re taking a few rest days from that.

In my last WOD with Dean, it was 5 Rounds. 10 ring push ups, with heels to the wall, 8 jumping pull-ups, first standing from the 25lbs. bumper, then 10lbs. then the floor. And 10 kettle bell swings, first with the 75lbs., then the 88lbs.

Oh the joy in asking your body to be capable, and it more than surpasses your expectations.

I was sad that it was the last of our training sessions. He taught me much: Resistance training with chains and bands, corrected my deadlift form to where I pushed through that plateau and PR’d twice in the following two weeks, rounding out at 245lbs. Did I mention the PR box jump at 27″? That was a surprise.

At the end of class I asked him for a hug. A big hug. It was a lot to ask. I was sweaty. He stood on the giant Strongman tire and reached down and hugged me tight. You’re a good person, he said.

So are you, I said.

In the end, past the technical stuff, Dean taught me that I am strong. Stronger than I know. He also taught me to have confidence in my strength.

I think for a very long time I was embarrassed by my strength. Tried to hide it. I’m pretty tall. Especially tall for a girl. Strength in a girl is not generally celebrated. People say they like tall women, but I have plenty of awkward teen and college years to prove otherwise. The 20’s are a whole other train wreck. In summation, there have been more than a few very difficult moments. And it would always make me feel better when people would say, You’re a big girl. …. ***….

Never call a girl big. Just don’t do it.

I was embarrassed by my size. I was certain those around me were embarrassed for me too. What I really wanted to do was just disappear. And often tried.

This is not just another accolade to Crossfit. But rather an opening in the way I see things. A softening in how I see myself. A gentle confidence growing. This is a song to something I see as a result of showing up, and getting used to being uncomfortable. This is a welcomed change in how I see myself in the world, something I like. Crossfit, in all its complexity (and there is a lot under that umbrella), has brought this out in me.

It’s okay to be strong. It’s okay to be who you are.

yourself. or someone like you.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do you think the person who you think you are, changes over time? Or are you the same person all along? I think it changes. As your goals change, so do you, as you readjust, realign in the direction you want to go so too does the person you are.

Last weekend as a close friend was getting ready to run a half-marathon, and I was getting ready to meet another dear friend to run a 5K, the friend running the half sent the following text to me:

‘Look how many people you have inspired this weekend.’

I had forgotten that six months earlier I succeeded in getting her organized and registered for the half because it sells out so quickly. What I was really trying to do was to get her to run the full. I know she could, if she really wanted to. But we settled for the half.

It was probably the best thing anyone could have said to me, ever.

I have never thought of myself as an inspiration to anyone. But if my dedication to Crossfit, to being active, to simply entering the race, is any indication of me being myself, then I am truly happy in arriving at being who I Am.

Whenever I see deadlifts in the WOD, my heart skips a joyful beat. As  I love them so.

WOD

I. Deadlift

5 sets, 7 reps

*2 minutes rest between sets

Completed: at 165 lbs.

II. 2 Rounds:

25 Kettlebell Swings (70/53)

25 Pullups

25 Burpees

Completed: Kettle Bell at 45 lbs. Pullups scaled to ring dips. Total time: 9:58. Just under the wire. I’ve decided I’m no longer scaling my burpees, or any other reps for that matter. If it takes me to the very last to finish, then it takes me to the very last. Scaling reps was allowing me to chicken out. And chickening out is no path to success.

Soon to be old friends.

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as making a “life.” I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou

I am officially on vacation. Tomorrow I hop a plane and go off to visit some very dear friends in a warm environment. We will fish, we will cook really good food, and share really good wine, we will sleep in late and when we finally wake up, sit on the couch and drink coffee in our pajamas. Most importantly, we will share, and we will laugh. We will hug, and we will look each other in the eye and smile, with that knowing that says, it is so good to see you old friend. And even though we live far a part, it is just as if you’ve been beside me all along.

It feels funny knowing I won’t be into ACF for a few days. My initial reaction is, what momentum will I lose, what ground gained, lost? But mostly, I will miss my family. True story.

ACF and I, we are soon to be old friends.

You walk through the door and its high fives and knuckle bumps and hugs.  It’s sharing stories about your day, and your plans for your wedding, and how you might have had a hard day at work and you were not sure you would but you’re glad you made it to the WOD.

For me, it’s my happy place.

A happy place where I work my ass off with other people. It’s like it’s the year 1842, and we’re settlers on the prairie, all working together, as a team, to get a job done, our livelihoods depending on each other. Sounds silly, I know, but I would never work this hard if it were not for the people around me, doing the same. The community that surrounds.

WOD:

I. AMRAP in 15 minutes:

15 Kettlebell Swings (70/53)

15 Burpees

Completed: 5 rounds plus 2. Kettle Bells at 45 lbs.

For those of you that are counting, that’s 77 Burpees. This WOD was hard. No other way around it. It was a BEAST. Burpees, you kick my ass. Thought to myself at one point, Go on, scale the burpees, this is too hard for you, no one will know. Just do 10 instead of 15 per round. But, I didn’t. I stuck to it, and completed each and every rep, as prescribed.

II. For Quality:

100 Hollow Rocks

100 Superman Rocks

Onto Strongman!

What a way to go on vacation. WOD then Strongman. As Carmen coined it so eloquently this evening, two hours of lovely torture.

Keg Press and Tire Flip relay. Post WOD was weak and couldn’t get the 57 lbs. keg overhead. Whoa. So converted to 30 lbs. and upped the reps to 10, Snatch style. First round at 1:54. 2nd at 1:44. And now, vacation may forthcometh.

You Can.

“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it.” ― Lou Holtz

WOD:

I. Establish a 2RM Deadlift in 15 Minutes

Completed: PR at 235lbs!

II. 6 Minute AMRAP:

Hang Power Cleans (155/105)

Kettlebell Swings (70/53)

Completed: Hang Power Clean at 75lbs. Kettle Bell at 45lbs. 6 rounds, plus 7. Dean was coaching, and told me to put more weight on the bar. He was right, as usual. Sometimes just need someone to tell you, You Can.

III. Accumulate 3 Minutes in FLR on Rings

Just Jump.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards…You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever – because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well-worn path.” ― Steve Jobs

I went on vacation. And it was awesome. But now I’m back from vacation. And it’s not so awesome. My diet while on vacation was one of someone who is on vacation. I took a vacation from Paleo. I took a vacation from eating totally healthy. The wheels didn’t totally come off, but there were definitely some speed bumps. And that may be awesome, or not so awesome, depending on how you look at it.

Regardless, I made it back to the triple wide today. And that is, yep, you guessed it, Awesome.

WOD:
I. Complete 6 rounds:
1 minute – 15 Kettlebell Swings (70/53)
1 minute – Row max distance

*Alternate 1 minute bouts of KB Swings and max distance rowing.

*You have 1 minute to get 15 swings, the next minute row for max distance. Alternate this 6 times for a total for 12 minutes.

Completed: with awesome partner, Annie. 35lbs Kettle Bell. 2,310k total distance rowed.

II. 5 Sets:
Max Strict Pullups

Completed: 10, 10, 9, 6, 5. scaled to ring dips.

Do you ever feel stuck in a place that you know deep down to your very core is no longer right for you? Do you ever feel paralyzed because you know you’re stuck, and you’re scared to get unstuck? Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the idea of trying to change where you are, even though you know its simply not right for you anymore?

That first step in a new direction is sometimes the very most difficult. But you have to remember, just because it seems difficult, does not mean it cannot be done. It only means you haven’t tried yet. And the more looming, the more daring the leap, the bigger the reward once you’ve cleared it. Because you will clear it.

You just have to jump.

Time-Space-CF-Continuum

“A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do.” ― Bob Dylan

It’s funny but I don’t feel like I even hit a WOD today. Probably because I was up and at ACF for the 5:45am class. Another byproduct of my mid-life crisis lust filled affair with FB. And ACF. The gauntlet was laid down via FB post for the 5:45am, and by golly, I was up to the challenge.  But perhaps because we were done so early, by 6:45am, it felt outer orbital. For the rest of the day it felt as if I was in another space-time continuum and thereby, never hit any WOD at all. Which led me to check the website 2 or 3 different times, as is the perusal to view the torture that awaited at the end of the day, only to then remind myself upon reading the WOD, ‘Wait, I already DID that.’

Warm-Up:

Run 400

30 Walking Lunges (each leg)

25 Burpees

WOD:

I. Review Kettlebell Swing

II. 3 Rounds For Time:

25 Kettlebell Swings – (70/53)

25 Box Jumps – (20″/14″)

III. Barbell Smash on Calves

Completed: In 9 minutes. Kettle Bells at 35lbs.

The mood this morning was electric. A feeling of, I can do anything!, permeated when the WOD came to a close.

I need to do this again, I thought.

Rock Star status was achieved in my own mind, and the view of the world for the day ahead was one from gratitude, cheer, and good fortune.